Excuse Me To Busy Writing Your Tragedies

People have recently told me I am ruining their lives. I personally can not ruin someones life they can only ruin it themselves. When people tell you that you are ruining someone else's life they must be lying because you can not "write their tragedies." People make problems for themselves, you can't make problems for them.
Full story:
So..... I supposedly called my friend a bitch or something when I never did and now she hates me and won't talk to me or read any messages I send her. I don't like people calling her a bitch so why would I call her a bitch unless I was joking, and when I am joking she knows that. Funny thing is she calls me a bitch all the time so I don't get it. Anyways.......... now she has her boyfriend against me and its a huge mess. I don't hate her even though a lot of people think I should. I just want her to realize she is being a bit over dramatic about the whole situation. I apologized more than once and she didn't even reply so I don't know what's gonna happen.

"I told you so!" (picture is of me and my ex)

Is there really anything worse than being told... "I told you so," when you are down in the dumps?

That is what has been my life this entire week. Through tons of people saying "good" "you're so stupid" "I told you to think about it," I had to sit or stand and smile my fake smile.

But every time I come down stairs with my stuff animal bunny and my ex's hoodie my parents figure out i am in a sad sad mood. It is really hard when my parents didn't like my ex in the first place (my ex is the guy i mentioned in the last entry). I like him a lot and when my mom says "good," after my not so friendly acquaintance tells her that me and my ex broke up, it really hurts. It is hard to pull through it each day but sometimes you just have to cross over bridges that you must work hard to build. You get headaches and end up crying cause you are tired of having to keep trying to build that bridge but once you finish you can tell the world you made it over.

I should really take my own advice...

I had a dream it was about a nightmare

So last night I had a dream about pretty much....death. In the begining I was just hanging out with this guy and my two guy friend (whom had huge crushes on me), were jealous. Then when I came home after not speending time with my friends and family my mother told me that my dad was dying of some sort of disease. My father looked old and withered...he was definatly dying. I cried, I ran to my room and cried. When I awoke I was dead. I was walking around a field of nothingness. And then I saw all my friends...and a couple people who aren't my friends, and they had all died as well. As we walked through this nothingness we talked about all the things that were actually there. We went to the bathrooms and watched this random boy play video games. Then I realized I still had my phone with me, so I watched the videos and looked at the pictures of all the best memories of my life. It showed me that there are always so many things that you bring through your life and some even through death. It was a sad yet peaceful dream knowing that even when you are dead you will be remembered.

Football Is Not My Life

I don't know much about football but that isn't what this is about. Sometiems (mainly in the summer) people just don't want to do anything in their lives. You just wanny be lazy at some point. So you sit online...chatting to random people who you know and you just don't do your chores, or work, or anything else you need to do.
Its at that point in time when you realize "Football is not your whole life." Somethings aren't all you have in your life... school isn't your life, college isn't your life, adulthood isn't your life. From birth to death that is what your life is and anything in between just make up the person you will be when you are dead. Life isn't always a rollercoaster ride, sometimes it is a smooth car trip across the straightest street you have seen and then there are bumps and hills along the way and crazy rollercoaster rides but nothing will ever be the same as your life.

We're all depressed....So why are you laughing

Everyone thinks their lives are the worst... and when you get to talking about it you realize it really could be worse. I know my life isn't half bad compared to my friend's alcoholic father, my other friend's sister have to see her cheating fiance, and so much more. You hear these stories and you don't think maybe that could be me sometime, living through a scary situation that completely haunts you for the rest of your life.
Its not something to laugh about. You wouldn't laugh if you had to go through one of those situations so why would you laugh at your friends. I know this girl who laughs at the most inappropriate times. She heard that her ex was cutting himself and she laughed...her dad yelled at her she laughed...and worst off while all of her friends are moping around this morning....she goes and laughs with her boyfriend all over her.
Boyfriends don't come first and neither should girl friends. Both her and her boyfriend have lost the majority of their friends because they won't get off of eachother. And people wonder why I don't like her anymore. Its because for two seconds she can't even hug her friends anymore, for two seconds she can't take a simple second to get up and not talk about her boyfriend.
So yeah life could always be worse but it can also always be better.

Lemonade

When life gives you lemons you spray that sour attitude in peoples faces. Why? Because people deserve it. There are always things that you don't want to live with in life and you still must go through with them. For me that time is going home... to my place of torture.
Why should I go home to a place where I am not loved, trusted, even looked at? Why should I waste my time on people who don't care a thing about me?
I sit in agony wishing that it was over sometimes... and then I think... how would those people who I have spent my whole life loving... how would they feel if I just didn't show up at school one day...and that small knife falls to the floor with tears. If I ever left those few people who I do love, and who love me back... wouldn't it just be ruining their life... more than it destroys yours.

They Come, They Eat, They Leave

I know a few people in my school who literally come to school, go to lunch, and then just roam the halls looking for trouble. It funny to watch how free those people are. They don't care if they fail, or get caught, or go to in school suspension. They can swear all they like at whom ever they like, they can get into fights without a single threat to their lifes. They just make sure, they come, they eat, and they leave.
Life is also like that. We are born, we live, we die. We come, we, eat, we leave. At any moment any one can just fall over dead, due to what ever disease, or other excuse possible. Its so simple when you think about it. One minute here and then the next...you aren't.
My friend is the one who helped me come up with the theme today... Its like bugs life...the Disney movie...so simple.